There isn't much else in the world that annoys a person than unsolicited advice. Even if the person has "gone through" the same or similar thing, it's still not the same. They're not the person they're attempting to advise. They grow up the same way; go through the same things, have the same values, strengths and weaknesses. How valid is the advice? Did they ask for advice?
I have seen and also been guilty of the opinion vomiting mentality we are submerged in. It is everywhere. Where did it begin? Advertisements? Are we walking advertisements for humaning? Live this way, do these things and this is how your life will go? It's an interesting thing to think about, isn't it? Pay a bit closer attention in the coming days and even weeks if you wish. See how many things you encounter that are a solicitation or invitation to make an agreement with an opinion, way of thinking or system. And if you've been following me for any amount of time on my other social media sites, you would notice my slight aversion (sarcasm) to systems and unhealthy attachments.
How much of what we exchange with other humans is unsolicited projections? Is it necessary? Is it helpful to the connection or more on the harmful side?
I had some massive revelations when I begin feeling into the interactions, I'd been having with the people that had been present in my life for a very long time. I'd realized that many of our conversations were heavily loaded with opinions that were forced upon me and projections of who I ought to be or how to handle this or that situation. Was any of it warranted? Did I ask? This all coming at a time when I was 2nd guessing myself, every move I made and every decision I made--- I was inadvertently looking to others for answers through subtle clues and nuances, like, how did they handle that? But did I ask? No... was it helpful? No.
To be completely fair here, what was the solution I came around to applying?
I didn't receive the projections or opinions anymore, which also forced me to regain control of my own life and decision making. If I no longer allowed space for anyone projecting onto me "who I should be," I had the space to decide who I am. See how that works? Boundaries lovelies, boundaries...
We are never the victim of these sorts of things when we are willing to own our part in it and shift it. Nothing has to remain the same, energy is constant motion, and we are made of it. If we stayed the same how much are we growing? It's funny I got one of those guilt trips from someone about how they miss the old me and brought up all the different phases I've moved through and called my changes being "lost." I laughed. How I see it? I tried it, it wasn't for me.
If we're here to experience life and we always stay the same or stay in the same little playground, how much are we really experiencing?
Change is good. Staying the same is stagnant. Ever see a goldfish, floating about mid tank, not moving? Uh yeah... Keep moving lovelies.
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